Dreamer

She still dreams after she woke, 

Tight hold on that hope.  

Sometimes it can seem so cold, 

Do what you got to do to cope. 

This is life, we all strain
While we pray for dollars & we work for change
It's all the same, we all struggle
Sometimes you gotta say fuck you

Haven't written in a while.  This line struck me the other day with recent events that have passed in my life.  Thought it was really well said.  I think some of this realize this a little too late in life.  You have to do what you have to do for yourself sometimes, and I do not believe that is a selfish statement.  Without yourself, you have nothing.  I have been working on some new ideas lately, and I figured something out.  For the entire year of 2009, it was nothing but constant disaster.  Not one solitary moment of silence, unless that very silence was the very thing that was choking me.  Now 2010, it hasn't been the smooth sailing that I had hoped for, but it has been a wonderful year.  Sometimes a little turbulence can wake you up.  This year is (so far) exactly what I expected.  I am making up and correcting with constant compensation for last years constant disaster.  By late June 2010, my disasters will all be made up for, and I can start living again.  This is all a learning experience.  Once July 2010 hits, I will not be in Los Angeles again until mid-August.  I cannot wait to travel a portion of the world.  Just the thought of it is the ultimate high.  But I have come to a bigger conclusion just recently.  An epiphany, if you will.  In December of 2010, I will be 20 years old, and between the ages of 20 - 25, I am going to completely rip this world apart.  I will find my success.  I will find the place that I will begin to create my empire.  I am not sure which success will come first, but it is bound to happen one way or another.  I know it.  The way I see it, I better correct all these petty mistakes now before it is too late.  Before my life really takes off.  Because by then, it will either be too late, or I still won't be ready.  I know this is not the case though.  This is only the beginning.  Life is a challenge always, but finding comfort and stability within the challenge is a challenge in itself; a challenge that I am willing and ready to take.  I have already begun.  I am ready to change the world in the same way that it has changed me.