Falling In Flight.

A New Age...

I am falling upon a new age. I am falling hard and fast...and when I hit the ground, I don't know what will become of me. I am invincible. I am superman. Not your superman...not their superman...I am my own superman. I am not a savior of any kind, rather I am the saved, however the grace has made my skin out of diamonds. I am beautiful and elegant. I am precious and original. I am one of a kind. I am completely invincible. I didn't realize the height from the ground until I had gotten too high, and I have taken the jump...I was pushed. Now, there is no other fate. I WILL fall, and I WILL land, but I am protected. My diamond skin will protect me, and all that it represents. The enigmatic time-line of my life, laid out in one abysmal falling. And so it is...here I am. Mid-flight. 6935 stories total, nearing collision. My pitch is zero, my yaw is zero, my roll is undefined. 120 MPH, my terminal velocity. I am unstoppable now. I am moving so fast that the impact may surely kill me, but at least I am going faster than most men have gone in their lifetime. I see this tragedy as an accomplishment. An experience that no one else has ability. A beautiful disaster, a sweet disposition, a bittersweet symphony. I am a perfect dropout. I am a doctor of philosophy. I become one with impact.

I hit the ground and I am awoken in a cold sweat. It is not my body that is falling...it is my mind. It is my heart. It is my soul and spirit. They are the diamonds, not my skin. They are unscathed and perfect, not even a scratch. I am an allotrope of carbon. My lattice is flawless. If the light is on me, I will fill your life with color. If darkness surrounds me, I will be still and listen, knowing that I am unbreakable. My electromagnetism gives new definition to elegance. I am my own wavelength. I am ἀδάμας. I am still growing.

This is what I have grown into, and this is what I will continue to be. In a world this cruel...in a city this damaged...brokenness is the new sliced bread. Everyone has it in one way or another. In this world of news, I find nothing new. I've found nothing pure...but maybe I'm just idealistic to assume that truth. Could be fact and form, that love could be a verb, but maybe I'm just a little misinformed. Let the trucks roll in from Los Angeles...maybe our stars are unanimously tired. So...let the wars begin...let mt fingers crack and let my world fall apart. Let my world explode, let my stars touch the ground, falling down like broken satellites. Let my love me strong. Let the rain fall down. Let the water clean and wash my deepest streets and darkest alleyways. My deepest secrets and darkest alibis. This is my city, and this is my world.

Maybe I'm just a realist in my sense of truth. Maybe I'm just a cynic in my sense of love. Maybe all of the contemptuous hours have caught up with me, and all of the street lights have passed me by. I am running on empty. But in my mind, which only a handful of people seem to understand, is that this does not add up to a negative. Not for me. I see this as salvation. For all the kings horses and all the kings men, all of the people in this life of sin, and all of the dreams that we've all held within, could never put this world together again...but I am made out of diamonds. I am not perfect, and I am not a pedestal. I am broken and dirty JUST like the rest of us...and in some cases I will say that I am worse off than any sad little situation that one could present to me...but I have worked past it. I have hit bottom, and I am now free. I was mined out of a cave, and now I am worn around the neck of a King.

There is still a little bit of your taste in my mouth, and still a little bit of you laced with my doubt. There is still a little bit of your song in my ear. But I have taken the jump. In my mind, I am falling and I am one with the rain. I am blinded by the clouds, and then the building tops, high rise, sky-scrapers come into view. I see my childhood. I see my enemies. I see my friends. I see my failures. I see my success and my accomplishments. I see my mistakes and unkempt promises. I see my love and my spontaneous surprises. I see my dishonesty. I see my loyalty. I see every life who has affected mine. I see every life who I have affected. I see every right and every wrong that I have ever committed, no matter how minuscule either amount to. I weigh it all, and take it all into consideration. I exhale heavily in relief, and inhale heavily again in prep. This is when I come crashing down, into my own abysmal city.

And so it is...I take my bag of transgressions and contraventions. My encroachments and errors one. My infractions and my infringements. Each and every iniquity, equally. My misdemeanors and offenses. The vices and wrongdoings. Each and every charge...I bring forth unto myself. I'll bury them in the warm pacific spray. I'll leave them in the desert to fend for itself. I'll blind them with a paparazzi flash. I'll squish them like an economic crash. I let them fall with me. I let them break and smash. The height and impact destroys them, and then the rain will wash away what is left. Rain on me...and let me fall. I am invincible. Reign on me...and let me fall. I am invisible. The predicament however...is that it is usually the fall that kills you, not impact.

Stones taught me to fly. Love taught me to cry. Life taught me to die...so it's not hard to fall when you float like a cannonball. Come on courage, teach me to be shy. Teach me.

And so it is...a new age is upon us. Another chapter and turn the page. I have gone through so many already, and it is time for another. Happy Birthday Nick...cherish this moment. Cherish every second. Cherish each individual and their life. Cherish your deliverance. Cherish your blessings...and deeply cherish the simple but seminal art of new beginnings.